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Title 1 of the Thagian Code: A Law Affirming Thederal Recognition of Sovereign States and for Other Purposes
Sec. 1 Addressing the matter of foreign affairs, it has been agreed to that the Thederal government, along with the United Federations, will recognize the full list of nations as sovereign, which are recognised by the United Nations. When a new nation is recognised by the United Nations, it will not be recognized by any Thederal body (Including the aforementioned United Federations), until an act of citizenry declares it to be.
Sec. 2 An act of citizenry, as expressed in Title 1, Sec. 1, is excercised in this section as follows: The United Federations, along with the Thederal governent, will henceforth recognize “The Principality of Sealand” as a sovereign nation under all circumstances.
Title 2 of the Thagian Code: A Law Addressing the Official Language of Legislation and for Other Purposes
Sec. 1 Addressing the matter of the language used by the Thederal Government of the United Federation of Thag, any and all languages may be used, due to the international nature of the UFT. The language of the laws and legislation will be English, with the international, traditional language of Esperanto being the nation’s traditional, cultural language.
Title 3 of the Thagian Code: A Law Prohibiting Theft of Physical Property
Sec. 1 Addressing the crime of theft of physical property, it has been decided that if physical property is knowingly and intentionally stolen from any entity which has the right to the possession of said property, and a Thagian court indicts you, your crime will be reported to the proper authorities with jurisdiction in the space the crime was committed.
Sec. 2 You will be tried in a Thagian court for reevaluation of your citizenship, which is subject to being revoked if found guilty by a court of the people.
Title 4 of the Thagian Code: A Law to Declare Homicide a Crime Against Humanity
Sec. 1 Addressing the crime of homicide, and any kind of murder or theft of human life not included in the term, is not only illegal, but a despicable breach of the most fundamental right a human is bestowed. If you are indicted by a court of people, you will immediately be extradited to the proper authorities having jurisdiction in the physical area where the crime against humanity was committed.
Sec. 2 You will be tried in a Thagian court for reevaluation of your citizenship, which is subject to being revoked if found guilty by a court of the people.
Title 5 of the Thagian Code: A Law Prohibiting Excessive Trolling
Sec. 1 Addressing the matter of “trolling”, a “troll” is defined as “A person who posts a deliberately provocative message to an internet message board with the intention of causing maximum disruption and argument” and for the purposes of this title, “excessive” is defined as “Ten counts of general ‘trolling’, followed by either: 2 counts involving bands OR 1 count involving ‘My Little Pony’”
Sec. 2 Excessive trolling is hereby prohibited under this legislation, with the punishment set at death by love and toleration. You will be treated kindly and lovingly by the government and citizens, which has been determined is the undesired response to trolling. It has also been observed that death will come naturally and peacefully decades afterwards.
Title 6 of the Thagian Code: A Law Affirming Charizard as the Official Fire Type of the Federation
Sec. 1 Addressing the official Fire type of Thag, it has been decided that Charizard shall be affirmed this position.
Title 7 of the Thagian Code: A Law Affirming the Physical Boundaries of the United Federation.
Sec. 1 The UFT will claim any and all clouds which are, at any given time, passing over the land claimed by the Commonwealth of Kentucky. Clouds which leave the airspace over Kentucky will be released into the public domain. If the claimed boundaries of the aforementioned Commonwealth are changed by the legitimate government of the Commonwealth, the boundaries with which we will claim airborne water formations will change to fit the newly ratified specifications. The airspace that the cloud occupies will continue to be property of the United States Government, and only the cloud itself will be laid claim to. Although the US Government lays claim to airspace, objects within the airspace can still be independently owned, as evidenced by private aircraft. These laws apply to Kentucky as well, so it has been deemed suitable to declare territory.
Sec. 2 The UFT affirms it's claim of the Library of Thag. This section also provisions a square foot in every direction from the building being also declared the territory of our nation, for the purposes of the Supreme Allied Commander of the Joint Thagian Forces being able to stick his arm out of the window, and have some of it remain in the state.
Sec. 3 The UFT will claim the dark side of the moon. If any and all sides of Earth's sole moon appear significantly and noticeably darker, or are not visible, than the Federation will henceforth lay claim to them. This does not apply to the moons of other planets, or the Pink Floyd album.
Sec. 4 The UFT will claim the dark side of the force.
Title 8 of the Thagian Code: A Law Affirming the Ongoing Support of Ponies by the Government of the United Federation of Thag
Sec. 1 The government of the United Federation of Thag affirms it's ongoing support for ponies by enacting this title.
Title 9 of the Thagian Code: A Law Affirming Firehouse Subs as the Official Restaurant of the United Federation of Thag
Sec. 1 By enacting this title, the government of the United Federation of Thag names Ohio, Indiana, and Kentucky Tri-State area restaurant "Firehouse Subs", the official restaurant of the Federation, citing the totally awesome drink machine found at many of it's over 485 locations, as well as it's awesome subs and friendly employees.